I’ve got a queen, but she only wears blue jeans
And I am a guy in Kirk t-shirt
Black boots and a red miniskirt
I’ll be in world of hurt if she ever finds out

I’ve got to think about it
I’ve got to work it through
If she learns my dark secret
What would William Shatner do?

I’ve got a chick, in bed a lunatic
Won't be my whore if she knows I love Star Wars
And I know only one thing for sure
I’ll never score If she ever finds out

I’ve got to make a choice now
Deceive her or tell her true
I know Vulcans never lie but
What would William Shatner do?

I love War of the Worlds, got a b**** for green girls
Alien nations, deep space stations
I love flying saucers, say “live long and prosper”
“May the force be with you”, Mr. Sulu

I want to be your man, “by your command”
Don’t want us to be undone, “danger Will Robinson!”
And if I decree “beedee beedee bee”
Does that mean we’ll be through?
What would William Shatner do?